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1. Every purse and coat pocket is rifled when you walk through the
door.
2. The bed has sausage shaped lumps under the covers.
3. The doggie door is only 8″ high.
4. You’re face gets licked by a dog standing on the back of the couch.
5. When you come into the house after being away only minutes and you
are greeted like you’ve been gone for 10 years.
6. When someone hands you a tennis ball as soon as you walk in the
door.
7. When the owners introduce their Dachshund as their oldest son.
8. Footstools are placed strategically around the furniture and bed.
9. The house is decorated with Dachshund items.
10. The owner is decorated with Dachshund items.
11. Gates are placed in each doorway.
12. After the doorbell rings, you can’t hear a thing for 10 minutes.
13. The alarm clock is set for HIS wake up time.
14. Dachshund “nose art” is proudly displayed on each window.
15. There are at least 45 balls laying around the house.
16. All socks, underwear, and shoes have holes in them.
17. The sign outside the house says, “Dachshund Lovers Parking Only.”
18. You have to look before you take a step.
19. All squeak toys no longer have squeaking ability.
20. The doors to many rooms must remain closed.
21. The owner’s bed never remains made.
22. Rugs and furniture are all dark colors.
23. The cat litter box magically cleans itself.
24. You will find dogs instead of clothes in the laundry basket.
25. When you arrive, you find the living room covered with chewed up
toilet paper rolls, Kleenex, etc…
26. All snow is shoveled from the yard to protect the “Ta-Ta’s” of
male Dachshunds.
27. You notice small fox holes in the yard.
28. You are kindly told not to eat the green beans and carrots because
they are for the dogs.
29. Toy boxes are bone shaped.
30. All waste baskets and trash cans are elevated at least 3 ft. from
the ground.
31. There is a Bissell Green Machine always within reach.
32. A cupboard is full of tiny clothes that were purchased before the
owner realized that Dachshunds would rather remain nudists.
33. Company doesn’t come around much anymore.
34. The owner talks a lot about getting a super king-sized bed.
35. The living room looks like it’s covered with snow due to the
batting which came out of de-stuffed toys.
36. Blankets cover each piece of furniture for better burrowing
purposes.
37. The owner has no food yet his Dachshund has plenty of premium dog
food.
38. The mailman is warned, “Watch out or he’ll bite a hole in your
sock.”
39. The mailman passes a brightly colored card to other mailmen
saying, “A dangerous animal lives inside. Do not use mail slot.”
40. Bricks are placed inside trash cans.
41. The Dachshund gets kisses before the owner’s significant other.
42. The owner runs around looking for a “sitter” if they’re going to
be gone for more than a few hours.
43. It is too dangerous to walk around the house without shoes because
of partly chewed up Nyla-Bones.
44. Little blue pee-pads are placed by the back door.
45. You notice that the Dachshunds receive more Christmas presents
than human kids.
46. All the owner’s computer “favorites” are Dachshund related.
47. The grass is mowed very very very short.
48. There is always plenty of toilet paper to pick up poops.
49. The owner’s bed is covered with no less than 4 gutted toys, 3
balls, and 2 nyla- bones.
50. You are immediately told not to sit in the dog’s chair.

http://dachsie.org/vbb/showthread.php?13388-dachshund-joke

I found this post and the thought you might like it too.

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When her little lady dachshund Frankie became permanently paralyzed, Barb turned what could have been seen as a tragedy into a triumph. Facing a dachshund owner’s worst fear, Barb learned from Frankie’s relentless joy and excitement and the two have risen to great heights, bringing happiness and life lessons into the lives of many by sharing the story of Frankie’s happy ending.

Leave a comment for Barb on this post for your chance to win a copy of her heartwarming children’s book, Frankie the walk ‘n roll dog, which she has generously donated so we can share it with you. We’ll announce the winner on October 31!

Please give her a very warm welcome and thanks so much Barb for sharing this post with us!

I must be honest. Caring for a disabled pet at the beginning was daunting and overwhelming. I think one of the hardest things was hoping I was doing everything within my power I knew to do, financially and emotionally. I wanted to help my dachshund Frankie, who ruptured a disk her back and is now in a wheelchair, as best I could.

Frankie does not have control of her bladder and bowels. Getting used to poop and potty here, there and everywhere at first just about did me in. One day after cleaning up another mess, I decided to change my thoughts about it and I literally said out loud to myself, “There are worse things in life than poop!” From that day on acceptance took over. Acceptance gave me the patience to focus on the timing of her bathroom habits and things became much easier.

I am a person who listens to many motivational and inspirational speakers. Learning from all I’ve heard, I decided to look for the blessing in our situation. I realized Frankie was teaching me any challenge I faced could be overcome by looking for a positive solution. She never felt sorry for herself and over came adversity with grace and dignity. She also easily accepted her new way of getting around by scooting at first and then learning to roll in her wheelchair. She is still the same sweet Frankie she has always been. Nothing about her changed, except for not having use of her back legs. She faces each day with enthusiasm and joy.

Yes, Frankie’s paralysis was an adjustment, but the blessing of it is that she helped me find my life’s purpose, which led me to writing her story in the form of a children’s book. We now share our lessons learned by visiting schools, nursing homes and hospitals showing others disabled dogs can live quality lives and anyone can overcome challenges with a positive attitude.

To watch a video of Frankie please visit our website at www.joyfulpaws.com
Frankie still enjoys a good roll in the grass 🙂

FOURTH ANNUAL

2013 Georgia Dachshund Races, June 22-23, 2013

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All proceeds go to DREAM Dachshund Rescue, an all-donation supported, all-volunteer rescue for dachshunds and dachshund mixes in our geographical area – Atlanta, North Georgia, and Savannah, DREAMDachshundRescue.org.

Georgia Dachshund Races is a member of the National Dachshund Circuit Races.

We follow strict rules for the safety of the dachshunds.

Winners are invited to the National Races in Ohio in September.

SATURDAY

Races for adult doxies, mixed doxies, non doxies, senior doxies, puppy doxies, and wheelies

Doggie weddings

Dog talent contest NEW THIS YEAR

SUNDAY

Junior Handler NEW THIS YEAR

Doggie weddings

Dog Talent contest NEW THIS YEAR

Costume contest for best female, best male, best group, best look-a-like

Coat contest for the best color, pattern, and type (short, long, wire)

Contest for the oldest, smallest and longest

Timed contest for best nose and obstacle course

Georgia Dachshund Races
gadachshundraces@bellsouth.net
GeorgiaDachshundRaces.com

http://www.georgiadachshundraces.com/